Posted in Newsletters
I’m very excited to be hosting a retreat at the breathtaking 42 Acres space in Somerset this June. It’s the second year running that I’ve been able to bring a Breathing Space Retreat to the UK, making it even easier for you to access the amazing power of your breath. In 42 Acres I couldn’t ask for a better venue. It’s beautiful and peaceful but easily accessible from London via a direct train followed by a 15min cab ride. Read on for more info…
Posted in Press
How is 2017 feeling so far? Are you looking ahead to a year full of possibilities, or struggling through the triple whammy of hangover, post-Christmas exhaustion and winter blues? If you’re not welcoming the new year with a spring in your step, perhaps one of your resolutions should be to make time for R&R by booking a health or fitness holiday.
Stepping away from your everyday life to relax and feel restored is no longer seen as an indulgence. Rather, it has become a necessary safety valve in our fast-paced world. Handing yourself over to be tended to by a range of experts can be an absolute pleasure. So go, either travelling solo or with a friend or family member. On all the wellbeing breaks listed here, you can be as sociable or as solitary as you like.
February: Breathing Space Retreat, Lanzarote, Canary Islands.
February sees these Spanish islands at their greenest, with reliable winter sunshine and early wildflowers – so it’s a perfect time to escape the grim British winter and book a retreat with the “breath guru” Alan Dolan. He’ll teach you the art of “conscious breathing”, which helps you access the full potential of your lungs to reduce the effects of anxiety and stress; it’s one of the most powerful therapies I’ve experienced.
Courses are based at a private villa in Oasis de Nazaret, a peaceful area 10 minutes from the beach at Famara. Each day includes one individual and one group breathing session (with a maximum of four others), poolside relaxation, star-gazing from the hot tub, holistic treatments and vegetarian meals. Island tours can also be arranged.
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We all know the wellness industry is booming, that’s nothing new. It’s a really exciting time to be part of such a fast paced industry and the trends for 2017 are looking pretty damn hot!
Of late we’ve seen a real shift in wellness ‘feeling good is the new looking good’. We’re all waking up to the fact that this is an inside out job. What do we mean? Well, If you want to look good you gotta do a little digging and clearing out on the inside to make the outside glow. For real.
It’s now totally the norm to head to Shoreditch House for a meditation session followed by brunch, or to finish your Sunday with a delicious sound healing session. With the world speeding up, content set to double in 2017, life isn’t showing any signs of slowing down and certainly not in cities! Self care is no longer really a luxury in this modern time. We all need a little summin’ summin’ to help us slow down, get present and relax.
To those of you who are workshop newbies, think self development slash self love with a sprinkling of spirituality on top. And before you freak, It’s really not as ‘woo woo’ as you imagine and even if it is a little, rest assured you’re bucking the trend and joining the wellbeing pioneers who are not only leading the way with this work, they have fun in the process too – imagine that!
Finally as a side note, New York and LA are usually at least a couple of years ahead in wellbeing trends, having already embraced the inside/out journey and turning it into ‘the thing’ to do with your mates – we couldn’t agree more. Welcome to the next frontier in wellbeing – A mind body and soul workout! Are you ready to dive in?
We’ve put together our top 5 favourite workshops for you all to try, there’s a little something in there for everyone. Disclaimer alert – all these workshops are entry level so if you’re thinking ‘I’ve never meditated before’ don’t let that stop you. Chances are most people won’t have. Enjoy!
The Breath Guru – Alan Dolan
This is warrior work – You can literally shift how you feel one breath at a time. Conscious breathing is a powerful and safe way to infuse the body with oxygen and energy, recharging our own (often depleted) systems to work to their healing capacity.
Humans have been aware of the healing power of their breath for millennia. Through the centuries we’ve developed a vast array of breathing practices, all designed to bring about physical and emotional wellbeing and connect with our deeper selves. in today’s society, we often neglect our bodies’ built-in capabilities. The fact is, most of us live in ‘standby mode’ most of the time. The most powerful mechanism is literally right beneath our noses waiting to be explored, yet we rarely give it more than a passing thought until now!
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We have just said goodbye to a lovely group and are getting ready to welcome our final guests for 2016. I continue to be in awe of what the Breath is capable of and of how powerful we can be as human beings. The things I see on a daily basis I would have filed under ‘Miracle’ not so long ago. Now I understand that these ‘Miracles’ are in fact very very natural. I have yet to find anything that can not be helped by working with the Breath.
We have one place left for next week’s retreat (it’s a double room so there are separate sleeping spaces for two persons) so if you are feeling the need for some inspiration just drop us a line. In addition, it’s 22 degrees, we have a heated pool and a very bubbly jacuzzi at the ready plus amazing food and our in house bodyworker / magician Martin all make the perfect context for some quality You Time.
If you know somebody who would benefit from a 1-1 breath session in London with yours truly we now have gift vouchers which can be used at any time throughout 2017. They’re downloadable in PDF format and cost the same as purchasing a 1-1 session directly.
Posted in Press
There’s no way to prepare for what will happen over the following four days. It’s 10am, and we’ve just arrived – 10 women from different places, with different stories and careers and varying outlooks and opinions – and are sipping chia and berry smoothies in the beautiful flagstone-floored kitchen of 42 Acres in Somerset.
There is welcoming small talk and bear hugs from the Finding Self Retreat leader, Tony Riddle, a ‘natural lifestyle coach’, brimming with energy. Anticipation is keen. All we do know is that we are here to find some things, and let go of others.
I’ve been hanging on to guilty shadows for years: returning to work weeks after having my first child (financial necessity, perhaps, but small salve for the emotional knots it created); post-natal depression that swallowed me up into a sleepless, lost void. Years have passed, but the guilt remains, and surfaces too often.
Sometimes, I find myself parenting on autopilot – repeating things that didn’t make sense to me as a child, and make no more sense to my own children. Reining in my kids, over and over again, when I actually long for them to run free.
Doors open to an incredible room – flanked on one side by views of the greenest garden and a grand oak tree – and filled with cushions, blankets, mats. Alan Dolan, a world-renowned ‘transformational breath expert’, guides us through the principles of breath work – something I’ve never tried before – and soon we are lying down, eyes closed, puffing and panting in regular rhythm. This is not your classic ‘deep breath in, slow breath out’ practice: Dolan encourages a longer inhale and a short puff out – as though trying to extinguish a candle, gently.
It feels unnatural and I struggle. But we keep going. He repositions people, checking that our mouths are wide open enough, and very lightly feeling our bodies for places where we might be holding most resistance. A woman beside me cries out – a primal wail that takes me back to the birthing room – then sobs uncontrollably, and Dolan helps her breathe through it.
Then another, on the other side of the room, howling, then panting and steadying, as her breath returns to normal. I feel unsettled and uncomfortable.
When Dolan comes to my side, I am tight and nervous. He softly, intuitively feels along my clavicles, ribcage, abdomen – and I am surprised when he touches a spot that makes me gasp. I feel embarrassed and try to hold it in, but it’s no use; and, instead, he guides me in breathing through it. It is uncomfortable but, as I learn during my stay, discomfort and resistance are telling us something, and we need to get better at listening.
I spend 30 minutes struggling with the process – feeling light-headed, as though the breath pattern is too shallow, which makes me feel anxious. And then, unexpectedly, everything loosens up: my neck relaxes, my jaw stops feeling taut and tense, and I just breathe. And lose time. Twenty minutes later, I become conscious of feeling light and happy – and rested. Remarkable.
We wander across to the communal dining room for our first plant-based lunch, made by resident chef Mark Mabon. The fare is vibrant and full of vital goodness: butternut hummus, sprouted crackers, sweet potato wedges, beetroot soup, buckwheat tabbouleh and seaweed rolls. It’s clean and nutrient-rich grub, without being ascetic.
Towards the end of our stay, we get scrambled eggs at breakfast because our bodies crave warmth and protein as the healing work gets more intense, and many of us go into hibernation mode.
The ties that bind
Next, we meet Nicola Dunn, a ‘family constellations practitioner’. I am, again, unfamiliar with her practice. The belief is that, as children, we remain deeply bonded to our families, and it is difficult to break free of ancestral patterns as we grow – out of filial, inherent loyalty, but also for fear of being disowned by the ‘tribe’.
Family constellation work seeks to highlight these patterns that restrict and harm us, and to allow us to be released from them; to feel empowered to walk our own path, without being owned by, or owing anything to, shadows of the past.
To say my cynicism was heightened would be an understatement – and to explain the mechanics of how one’s story unfolds seems reductive. It is what it is – neither rational nor easy to understand, but powerful. This work is the most bruising part of our time at 42 Acres. The deep-rooted trauma, pain, sadness and regret that fills the room with each story is profoundly moving.
Stories so different from my own strike a chord of human connection, and we weep for our sisters, mothers, fathers, grandmothers. How patterns of pain are repeated generation after generation – alcoholism, mental instability, adultery, abandonment – became clear for all to see. But we are not our mothers or fathers, we carry no legacy.
We end our first day shaky and drained – but protective of those who have opened up about their pasts in a room full of strangers. A quiet dinner, as people process the day… then we are ushered back into the same room, transformed with candlelight and blankets, to lie down for a sound bath and energy healing, with Carly Grace and her crystal singing bowls.
I feel completely enveloped by Grace’s mesmeric voice and those beautiful frequencies.
The new day begins at 7am with Riddle, the Finding Self Retreat mastermind, taking us through a series of simple movements – which, nevertheless, challenge our bodies to the limit. On hard wooden floors, kneeling, stretching, spreading toes, taking the body’s weight on our knuckles (ouch!) – movements our primitive ancestors would have performed as part of a normal day.
Then, outside to the wet grass, barefoot, which draws groans and complaints, until Riddle, who is skilled at putting first-world problems into perspective, helps us see the wonder of it all: green grass, blue skies, morning dew, and a chance to roll, jump, run, hop and play.
At one point, we are pressed forehead to forehead, looking into the eyes of the person opposite! It feels uncomfortable, confrontational, unnatural… and then, totally peaceful.
During the next transformational breath-work session with Dolan, my asthma and hayfever reach fever pitch. I panic. I don’t have an inhaler with me as I’ve not needed one for 20 years. He assures me that this is my body resisting; that the minute you touch a spot that’s holding on to something painful or negative, your body has a reaction that makes you want to flee. Breathe through it, is his mantra.
I keep going and the heightened histamine responses quieten down. More breath work comes over the next three days, and we get a chance to move past the past, via Dunn’s constellationwork.
I work through my story – a new mother, shellshocked, lost, exhausted, doubting and distant. I see my little girls for all that they are – wonder, magic, wildness – and realise that they embody all that I’ve ever hoped for; they just need space and trust to thrive.
Transformed by freedom
The profound depth and energy of the Finding Self process – both emotional and psychological – shows on all our faces. We are deeply tired. We have little conversation left to make. We walk past one another with kind eyes, but need the emptiness of our private rooms to process all that has happened.
In the end, we learn more about each other than we know about our workmates, friends, even family… and, most powerfully, we learn about how far removed we have become from our natural, primitive ancestors.
To see Riddle move – roll, crawl, climb, jump – is to see a body that has left behind sloping chairs and squishy sofas in favour of the ground; a body that thrives on natural food – strong, lean, dynamic; and a mind that is passionately clear about how we should be living our lives, and encouraging our children to live theirs.
I’ve invested in barefoot shoes for myself and our children (vivobarefoot.com), and am no longer precious about them padding around parks, gardens, forests barefoot. I have been reintroduced to the purpose of play for play’s sake; as a means to natural movement, to free up that sedentary spine. But the latter would not have been possible without the lifting and clearing of the old debris – the stuff that weighs us all down, and fools us into thinking that we can’t, or shouldn’t, or mustn’t.
Somehow, over the course of the next few weeks, I transform. It is slow going, but the dedication you give to the retreat stays with you. There is no other way now that these freer instincts feel so natural. The day after the retreat, flung straight back into work, I wake with the darkest circles under my eyes that I’ve ever had.
Once the working day is done, I sleep and sleep and sleep, and meditate, and place crystals around my home, and read books, and feel as though my eyes are wide open for the first time since childhood. I see my children in a different light. I want to learn and grow and heal. I want to be a better mother and ensure my children live free of my own mistakes and misgivings.
I stop blowdrying my hair. I donate half of my clothes. I clear out my cupboards. We collect wood from the forest and make bonfires and sing in the garden. We map the stars. We marvel at the moon. We retreat back to a place where the good things live… and vow never to lose sight of them again.
Posted in Newsletters
Hope you all had a wonderful summer. I’ve been in the UK at 42 Acres in Somerset and I’m now getting ready to head back over for a workshop at Indaba Yoga on September 11th, plus some 1-1s to boot. The workshops are great fun and massively powerful, but if you feel like something deeper and more intensive, head over to the Lanzarote retreat which runs year-round. Details of both below, along with an introduction to my colleague, friend and namesake Alan Purves.
With love, Alan